If you had half a brain, and I had half a brain,
And I gave you a quarter of a brain,
And then you lost your brains, butI still had my brains,
Then how many brains would I have?

If you had half a brain, and I had half a brain,
And I went to the brain store and I bought a million brains,
Then I gave you a brain, and then you lost your brain,
Then how many brains would I have?

This is the brain song, learn to count my brains.
This is the brain song, oh yeah.

If you had half a brain, and I had twenty brains,
And then you lost your brains, and so I gave you twenty brains,
And then I bought a brain, and then I lost my brains,
Then how many brains would I have?

If you had half a brain, and I had half a brain,
And I gave you a brain, and you gave me a brain,
Then I gave you a brain, and then you lost your brains,
Then how many brains would I have?

This is the brain song, learn to count my brains.
This is the brain song, oh yeah.

If you had half a brain, and I had half a brain,
And I replaced your brain, with a model train,
And then I lost my brain, so then I took your train,
Then how many trains would I have?

If I had half a brain, and then I lost my brain,
So then I bought a brain, and bought another brain,
And then I lost my brain, and I had no more brains,
Then how many brains do you have?